Meat Eaters’ Farts Contain 4-Times More Methane Than Plant-Based, Study Finds

Human farts emanating from meat eaters’ rears are officially destroying planet earth, a new study has found.

The ‘Gastronomic Report’, commissioned by Meatless Farm, revealed that carnivore cheek squeaks contain up to four-times the amount of methane as those following a plant-based lifestyle.

‘Meat-thane’ a huge concern

Scientists were so shocked by the findings that they are calling for methane gas – a greenhouse gas which has a critical effect on global warming – to be renamed ‘meat-thane’ when referring to human emissions.

For many years, environmentalists have pinpointed meat farming and cow flatulence as two of the biggest methane emitters. However, it transpires that the bodily functions of meat eaters are just as much a concern.

Meat eaters pumps ‘more potent’

And, in another nose-peg worthy finding, boffins also found that meat eaters’ trouser trumpets contain higher levels of hydrogen sulphide and ammonia. This means that their trumps are particularly potent when released.

Morten Toft Bech, CEO of Meatless Farm, said that he was blown away by the findings of the study.

“We’ve known for some time that meat farming has a huge impact on our climate, but these new findings are a huge reason to hit the gas on investment and subsidise the sustainable proteins industry. This will help people eat more plant-based alternatives, so we can all reduce our emissions.”

Plant-based trumps meat

As well as reducing the amount of methane we emit, switching to a plant-based diet can also cut other greenhouse gas emissions and save water.

Did you know that if all UK households swapped a red meat meal to plant-based just once a week, it would cut the country’s greenhouse gas emissions by a staggering 50 million tonnes. That’s the equivalent of taking 16 million cars off the road or a reduction of up to 8.4% in the UK’s total greenhouse gas emissions.